You might have noticed... or not... that the ads are now gone from my blog. I never really liked the idea in the first place, only agreeing to display them on the promise of making my fortune without having to do all the hard work. But... the whole $9 something that I've raked in since the ads first appeared on my blog just doesn't seem to make up for the mess that my blog was. (Last month's takings amounted to a whole 18c... so far this month... zilch).
So... good-bye to commercialism... good-bye to capitalism... and all hail the return of anarchy and not selling out. I hope the page looks a bit neater now, at least.
• Wednesday 24 January 2007 - Good for you Tina...
Posted by chica
....I get sick of them all, not yours in particular. I have been getting a rash of those weird emails lately - I wonder do they have anything to do with my inadvertently opening some of the new adver-blogs? The Guru would know, for sure - but the timing is suspicious. I wish we could be rid of them - this morning all ten recently updated blogs are cons.
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• Wednesday 24 January 2007 - Yes, the spam could be linked to their sites.
Posted by tinacee
Support is trying to get rid of these spammers, but it is very time consuming. And when one is deleted they just set up another one. It's very hard to police when there's not too many people doing it. There is only so many hours in a day. But... just a thought... some of you are online a fair bit, especially in the mornings. Why don't you offer support some help? If you were shown how to delete these blogs you could get rid of them when you see them. If their ads are being deleted as soon as they're up it might prove to be too much hassle for them to continue. There are certain of us who would be trustworthy enough to do this little job, I'm sure. Do you think that'd work?
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• Wednesday 24 January 2007 - The thought ran through my mind also, Tina.
Posted by snowy
And nothing would give me more pleasure than zapping them. I doubt that blognow would give us that privilege, but I'll think about it further. I have been reposting my blogs every time I see the spam in an attempt to drive them off the bottom. The problem with this is there are other bloggers sandwiched in between the spam who I don't want to get rid of.
Beats me why the spammers persevere. I wouldn't have thought the revenue they get from blognow hits would amount to much.
• Wednesday 24 January 2007 - Considering how busy they are...
Posted by tinacee
and how many bloggers must be complaining, it might be worth a try. You can only offer anyway.
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• Wednesday 24 January 2007 - Blognow offered me admin rights
Posted by TheKittycatGirl06
But only for the support of the bloggers meeting in March. If they tell me how to do it, I could spend the early hours happily deleting in the States until then at least.
(By the way, still happening, just still waiting on them to keep coming through)
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• Wednesday 24 January 2007 - I sent a PM to Marcel
Posted by snowy
So, we'll see what happens. In the meantime Kitty, Marcel may be happy for you to do it. Appropriate really. After all, it's coming from your side of town...;o)
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• Thursday 25 January 2007 - Update
Posted by snowy
Marcel has replied that it is not possible to give me the access to the system to zap spammers, which I fully expected. He says that it may be possible to incorporate this facility in the future, but no promises.
Posted by tinacee
... and now you might get them thinking. It would be a useful tool in the hands of someone responsible. And if support could be assured that the responsible blogger were not going to just delete blogs willy-nilly it could be very useful to them too... not to mention time-saving...
It might be worth a bit of thought guys...
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• Wednesday 17 January 2007 - Nuclear? I spit on you.
I thought hard about posting this one today. Before I start... Snowy, I would hate you to think that I'm having a go... I hate to disagree with you, my friend. (technicallly I'm not disagreeing with all you've said, but overall...) Anyway, this IS an important issue and I'd just like to spread the word. Just the other day I was thinking that it was about time to stir up the energy debate again, given our idiot government and current social climate. Now, I think we all know how I feel about nuclear energy and the possibility that we might be saddled with reactors dotted across our country. And you also know how I feel about the impact of the mighty dollar on big business and corporate decisions. They will try and push the populace into backing nuclear reactors... it's in all their best interests to do so. Independant statements like Snowy's (god forbid), are working in their favour... and Johnny and his boys are rubbing their hands together in glee. Here is some of the best free advertising that they could ask for. (Yes, I can hear Snowy gagging in his weet-bix as I type)
Anyway, click here to read Snowy's entry. My comment on his blog is below (it's kind of a long one). Let me know what you think... then lobby the government. Lift your voices and be heard. Power to the people.
Never say never, Snowy Once upon a time we thought it was impossible to fly... 50 years ago we thought that reaching the moon was unattainable... 25 years ago mobile phones were the size of bricks, and today it's common to see them the size of a credit card... who knows what will happen in the next 10 years? Do you think we should all be defeatest and give up on trying to find an alternative? What was it that Albert Einstein said?... "If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?"
Wouldn't it be a shame if we spent all those millions on building nuclear reactors only to find that in another 20 years we could store a year's worth of solar power in one battery pack? And if we built all of those nuclear reactors? How much energy do you think would go into developing a safer alternative... really? What would happen to all of that research that has already been done? Would they try as hard, do you think... or would it come back to the amount of money that the govt has spent on bringing in nuclear energy. You know as well as I do that the almighty dollar rules when it comes to both governments and businesses.
Now, I also know that solar power stations (to run big businesses, etc) do not currently have the ability to work as effectively as coal-burning stations. But a station is not the only way to deliver power to the masses... if it could be augmented by personal home solar systems much of the country could manage quite well. I've seen solar power work on a home scale... a couple of solar panels and some batteries to store the excess. It does work on a single household scale... fairly well, actually... and that's without extra power being obtained from the grid. If every house had one and didn't need to drain the grid, wouldn't there be a hell of a lot more power to go around?
I don't know exactly how much power the country needs, but if that's still not enough, augment the solar power with conventional power until a better technology is born. Yes, coal is dirty but at least it's relatively safe. Safe enough, at least, to be used as a part-time thing... sort of a transition period until safe power alternatives can be developed properly.
NUCLEAR SHOULD NOT EVEN BE CONSIDERED... shame, Snowy.
Oh, by the way, I've seen generators run by solar (Ok, I don't know the size or scale that you're talking about). I've also seen things such as those big wood saws (that slice trees into planks), water pumps, pressure pumps, spotlights (and many more things) run by solar power... a home system. And yes, technology has improved majorly just in the last couple of years. Should we give up on solar power now, after all the work and effort that's been put into it? That's like giving up on a baby that's just learning to crawl... it doesn't make sense.
And one final point... you said... "wishing isn't going to deliver. It never did, and never will." Well, once upon a time someone wished that they could fly... then they went out and thought of a way that it could be done. Sometimes wishing is the push that you need to make something deliver the desired results. It's a dangerous thing to tell the masses that something can't be done... especially when it comes to something as important as this. If everyone were to believe that, who would be left to do the research? Who would even want to try?
• Wednesday 17 January 2007 - Nobody's saying to give up on renewable energy.
Posted by snowy
Just be realistic about what it is capable of now. And it is not capable of providing for our energy needs now, no matter how much wishing is done. It MAY be possible in the distant future. In the meantime we need to look at using a combination of renewable energy and clean coal, if it is technically possible to do so. If this is not possible then we are going to have to weigh the pros and cons of using nuclear to reduce greenhouse gases. And there are a LOT of cons to be considered.
I'm no advocate of nuclear, but it could also be argued that giving up on it now is also defeatist, as future research MAY show it to be a safe energy source, and waste disposal problems MAY be overcome.
As an aside, we saw a number of nuclear power stations in France, as well as a number of wind farms throughout Europe. So what does that prove? Nothing really, except that someone has decided that both forms of energy are viable for them. Time alone will tell if they were right.
Good renewable energy blog.
http://www.blognow.com.au/renewableenergy/
• Wednesday 17 January 2007 - Why I'm against the Nuclear option
Posted by petermcc
With the current untrustworthy Government, I feel that we need to kick back hard on nuclear. To my way of thinking, you have to be able to deal with the waste before you start generating it.
The UK were just dumping 44 gallon drums in the North Sea under Thatcher and in a manner that made it impossible to recover once the problems started to emerge. No doubt they were saying they had waste under contriol.
The US has been stockpiling waste for 30 years and don't seem to be predicting a solution any time soon.
This is an area that involves lots of money and Pollies. Not the sort of combination I want to risk the environment on.
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• Wednesday 17 January 2007 - Uranium...
Posted by plonka
Nice one Tina, but I think there's more to it.
There's another aspect to this that never gets press. Does anyone know how much uranium we think we actually have? From what I can find, which isn't much, I'll grant you, it seems that if we ramp up with the nuclear power thing the way the likes of Johnny wants to (remember, America also wants to, so does China, so does Iran and the list goes on and they'll need our minerals), in about 20 years time we'll be running out of that too. Uranium is a rare mineral, yet we have it in "abundance"? No-one else has quite what we do and when you get down to tin tacks, we really don't have that much, geolically speaking.
So why does Johnny like it so much? Seems to me it might make us quite a bit of cash in the short term. That's the scary thing about this governemnt. Johnny'd sell his wife if he though it'd turn a quick buck....
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• Wednesday 17 January 2007 - But what I want to know, is what we are for?
Posted by snowy
To me, the debate is about clean coal or nuclear, both supplemented by renewable energy. I go for clean coal provided the technology to reduce greenhouse gases proves feasible. If it doesn't, and we are serious about reducing greenhouse gases, then nuclear is an option that has to be considered.
It's all very well to say we are against something, but if we are to say that, then we must have a realistic alternative that we are for. Note the word, "realistic". There's no point banging on about renewable energy if it just isn't capable of replacing coal as a reliable supply. And it isn't.
Posted by tinacee
Yes, clean coal would be much preferable to nuclear. Even coal power as it stands is preferable to nuclear. Someone fanning you with a piece of paper would be preferable to nuclear power. It's an unnecessary waste of money (money that is just going to go into some rich guy's coffer anyway), time and resources. And it's infinitely dangerous. A monster in a cage... but if you make even one little mistake that monster will escape and kill potentially millions. How would you feel if your son or daughter was one of them? Would you say "Oh well, at least we still have the lights on?"
Snowy, I do agree that at this point in time there would have to be some kind of amalgamation of differing power supplies. I would support using coal to suplement alternative sources, but I will never agree that nuclear energy is suitable. I campaigned against it in the 80's and I'm seriously considering running off to protest it again now. It worries me that we've come this far towards turning Aus into another nuclear power.
Plonka, I agree with you. People don't realise that this is also a finite source of power. They are touting it as a wonderful source of energy... but then they did that with fossil fuels too. How long will it be before they decide that they have to look for something else to drain from the earth, I have to wonder?
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• Wednesday 17 January 2007 - And if clean coal isn't attainable?
Posted by plonka
Where? There's no such thing! It does and always will produce the same amount of CO2 when you burn it. So what do we do with the tons of CO2 we sequester? Where do we store that or how do we dispose of it? Will we dig a hole and store it in YOUR back yard? We can't let it out so it's just another monster in a cage, as you put it Tina. Not quite so deadly in the short term, I'll grant you, but we don't know about the long term yet... "Here be dragons...." springs to mind...
Still, coal is preferable to nucular (that's my George impression...:)). How about hydrogen? Just a thought.....
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• Wednesday 17 January 2007 - So, if clean coal is out.
And if we are going to use hydrogen, where do we get it from?
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• Wednesday 17 January 2007 - Where?
Posted by plonka
CIG...:) Seriously though, water. It's really quite cheap if you don't need better than 95% pure and that's good enough to burn. The 99.95% pure required for fuel cells is ridiculously expensive however.
Point is that ALL coal is dirty. There is no such thing as clean coal. All "clean coal" is, is a mechanism to seperate the resultant gasses after burning and store the CO2. It's an "after" process. The best place to store CO2 however, is in coal, various other hydocarbons or trees.
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• Wednesday 17 January 2007 - So it looks like dirty coal.
Posted by snowy
And that's not acceptable because of greenhouse emissions. You won't maintain present living standards or employment with renewable energy. You need energy to separate hydrogen from water, so that's a dog chasing its tail. Maybe we can use up all the natural gas to keep us going for a while.
The purpose of the execise is to show that there are no simple answers, no matter what the greenies may tell you. Somewhere along the line there is going to have to be compromise. I think we'll be going nuclear, or going back to living in caves.
Maybe both.
Correction: You will. Sometimes there's something to be said for being old. Not much, I grant you...
• Wednesday 17 January 2007 - Snowy. You think we shouldn't persue alternatives?
Posted by petermcc
Am I reading you right Snowy? Are you suggesting we shouldn't persue the alternatives?
Surely we should keep as many irons in the fire as we can. Howard is prepared to pour huge amounts of dollars into Nuclear but has effectively strangled renewables with the trailing off of subsidies on that 10 year plan.
Now if he could stand up and talk honestly and intelligently about why he has done this then I would be happy to listen, but it's simply not the case. It stinks to high heaven of the typical back room deals that we have had to suffer under current policy.
It's no good him calling on Ziggy for support. Zed has already blown his cred when he lied about Telstra profits to keep Howard happy.
I still don't understand why this idea of total replacement keeps popping up. If you ease the pressure on the domestic side of things and leave coal for the heavy duty stuff, surely that has great merit.
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• Wednesday 17 January 2007 - Thank you, Peter
Posted by tinacee
You've hit the nail on the head... it doesn't have to be all or nothing, does it? What is wrong with the idea of doing what we currently can to relieve some of the burden? Just using SOME solar power, perhaps coupled with SOME wind power and/or hydro-generated power would have to make a difference, wouldn't it? If we all took a greater responsibility for our own usage according to need and viability (eg, solar is not viable in rainy climes... tidal power is not viable in the desert, etc) it WOULD cut down the amount of coal we would need to burn. Then using coal for the bigger jobs wouldn't leave such a bad taste in our mouths. It may not be a good long-term solution, but it's a start. And technology WILL only improve. That's as sure as death and taxes.
And... how much does the govt want to spend on these nuclear reactors, anyway? Why not take that money and offer a subsidy for switching to solar to the average household? How many solar panels would all of those billions buy? And just how much pressure would that take off the grid? I'm not sure of the answers to any of this, but I'd be curious to know.
How about this...considering that millions (billions) has been spent researching power sources that will make a profit for someone (coal, uranium, gas etc), how about (and I just have a strange feeling this won't happen) our govt and private enterprise starts spending some REAL money on renewable energy research and refinement of current renewable technologies. It has taken far too long to refine solar cells due to a lack of any real funding.
Coal Resources recently built the second largest dragline in the world out near Emerald. The cost is in the hundreds of millions. An electricity guzzling beast to dig the coal to boil the water to run the generators that provide its power. Imagine what could be discovered/developed if that sort of money were used in research and development of alt. energy sources. This sort of thing can happen in a very short time. Look at flight. In under a hundred years we went from a 20 odd metre flight to landing on the moon...because flight was found to be convenient and profitable.
Find a way to make renewable energy profitable and we'll all be hippies in under ten years.
:o)
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• Wednesday 17 January 2007 - Sorry, but I'm getting a little tired of repeating myself
Posted by snowy
I haven't said that we should give up on renewables. I haven't said that we must go nuclear. I haven't said that we must go dirty coal. I haven't said that we must do anything. I have tried to identify alternatives, and form an opinion on whether those alternatives are viable or not.
I have said that there are immense energy and greenhouse gas problems confronting us. I do not know the answers. I have tried to stimulate discussion in an attempt to arrive at those answers.
Now we can try to educate ourselves on the alternatives so that we can arrive at an informed opinion, or we can just cling to preconceived notions according to our prejudices. That is up to us.
• Thursday 18 January 2007 - And thank you for trying, Snowy.
Posted by tinacee
As you said on your own blog, substantially we do agree.
Forgive me if I'm taking liberties... but this is what I see.
Solar on it's own is not viable for the entire country (I'll concede that point)... at the moment. We also agree that we have to do something about our current power usage and where it comes from... and soon. We should bring in some type of renewable energy (or energies) to supplement our current form of generating power. That nuclear power is not the best option... but that in the end we probably will have to accept it. And we also agree that with our current government it's highly unlikely that any 'green' energy will be widely accepted in the near future unless (as Gryph pointed out) it can be made profitable.
What I don't like is the idea that our fellow Aussies are being pushed blindfolded into something that the majority really have no idea about. Worse is the idea that they may just concede defeat and accept this horrible power alternative, just because they think that their voices might not be heard. It frustrates me no end... kinda like the way you felt at the time of the 'no' vote, I imagine.
I don't know what our few little words can do to change the direction of the tide, but I do believe that we need to try. And I believe discussion between friends who don't completely agree is the best way to come to any solution. Like you, I was also hoping that we could generate some discussion on the subject. That we could not only pass some ideas between ourselves, but the rest of the community too. I must admit that I wonder whether those who have read this entry will think a little harder about my tack on the subject. Then the vain part of me wonders how much of an impact my words have made. I'd like to think that people have taken the discussion further than their computer screens... discussing it with friends at the pub, or with family around the dining table, for instance. Judging by the amount of hits that I received on my blog yesterday (much higher than usual), we've been successful in generating some interest on the subject... at least a little bit.
Ok, so we might not have come up with a good solution in the last 24 hours, but a few of us have had a bit of a rant and a bit of a think... and with any luck we've made a few others think too. Wouldn't it be good if something either of us said could change the tide? We'd be heroes.
There goes the head, swelling up like a balloon... I think I need a lie down now.
• Thursday 18 January 2007 - I'd still like to run with clean coal. if it is at all possible.
Posted by snowy
If for no other reason than the economic impact of closing all our coal mines would be devastating to a lot of people. Little people. And they're the ones I care about.
Posted by plonka
Unfortunately Snowy, it's not possible. Sure, you can clean the exhaust created by burning the coal, but you can't have clean coal.
I agree that it takes energy to create hydrogen, but then it takes a lot more energy and a hell of a lot more man power and infratructure to get coal out of the ground. Dogs have their day Snowy, but dogs with no tails have weak-ends...
That said however, I'm not really trying to poo-poo the whole "clean" idea, just the slant that Johnny likes to put on it that it seems a lot of people like to agree with. I do agree that it's a better solution than the dirty processes we currently use, but I also have to agree with Tina. Many years ago, we set fire to gas to make light, now we set fire to gas to make electricity to make light. I have faith that a solution will be found. In the mean time? Well I guess I'll side with Snowy and say lets burn that filthy coal, but spend the extra money cleaning the exhaust and finding somehow and somewhere to store the resultant CO2...
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and am not very optimistic about it as a solution, either.
I don't know where we go from here. I really don't.
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• Thursday 18 January 2007 - Energy...
Posted by plonka
Yep. It also requires more energy which means more money...... Hadn't got that far. I'm still trying to convince people that "clean coal" doesn't mean that coal is clean...
There's no doubt, it's a conundrum of the highest order. Still, like I said, I have faith that a solution will be found. We're a tenacious bunch and if we keep the topic alive, well....
There's a group in Melbourne who say they've come up with a very cheap and efficient way to make hydrogen (saw it on Sunrise a few weeks back), but I can't find a link...Damn... So at this stage, I can't say that hydrogen's a viable answer either.....
I don't think anyone knows where to go with it at this stage Snowy, that's why we need to keep having these debates. Besides, they're fun...:)
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• Thursday 18 January 2007 - Clean coal
Posted by snowy
I always understood that clean coal was more than washing the coal, Plonka. I guess I have to still pin my hopes on it. Otherwise, I can't see any alternative to nuclear, and that depresses me.
I just read the following in Crikey. I don't know if he knows what he's talking about, or not:
Mike Martin writes: Richard Farmer might explain that the hydrogen economy is not a "vision thing" but a "mirage thing" (yesterday, item 11). Yes, hydrogen gas is a clean fuel, but it is expensive to store and transport and, more importantly, it does not exist on Earth. It has to be manufactured. The most cost-effective method currently is by steam reforming of methane (from natural gas). This process liberates the carbon dioxide that would be produced if the gas were otherwise burned, and wastes about a third of the gas's energy content. Hydrogen can also be produced (far more expensively) by decomposition of water, using electricity generated by wind farms or other renewable energy sources. It may, in the long term, be a viable intermediate form of energy storage for vehicles, but it is not obviously superior to biodiesel or ethanol manufactured from crops. But this won't stop the Prime Minister. He will be ready, when the truth eventually emerges, to swear that, "I wasn't told".
Posted by tinacee
We'd expect that from Little Johnny though, wouldn't we? Even if we sent him a personal e-mail outlining all of it, he 'wouldn't see it'. It's what he does best... not knowing things.
Why do we (not me... just clarifying that) keep voting for a man who thinks he can treat us like idiots? Isn't it his job to find these things out? Shouldn't we insist that he make a truly informed decision on such important issues as this? But he doesn't... he only moves because of someone behind the scenes pulling his strings. And when people ask him to explain himself, why does he refuse to defend his own decisions? "Oooh, that wasn't my fault, I didn't know about that," seems to be his favourite saying. How hard is it to do a little research? (Can you spell G-O-O-G-L-E, Mr Howard?) Does he really prefer to be known as an uninformed idiot? Is that the kind of person we want to make our decisions for us? It doesn't make me feel any confidence towards the government. I don't want to trust my children's health, wealth and security to the fools that are in office. And I certainly don't want him to make any decisions on what is or is not safe, either. As a general rule... if he thinks it's a good idea, it's crap!
Isn't it about time that we Australians kick this government out and find ourselves a bunch of people who are prepared to stand up and explain their decisions... and someone who has the balls to stand up to all of those big businesses that would gain by introducing nuclear. After all... there really are only two reasons to want it here now... money and political backing. It's all about what they believe is best for the small (and rich) minority (many of them multi-national) rather than real Australians. It should be about what WE, the majority want, should it not?
Posted by plonka
Ah, but Johnny has done his research. He's obviously spent quite some time reading Machiavelli and Sun Tzu. Sun Tzu was very clever. If you can find "The Art Of War" (no, you can't have my copy) have a look at a little thing called "deniable accountability". You will also find it in "The Prince" (Machiavelli). It's almost spooky. Half of Johnny's rhetoric comes straight from those chapters...
What you do is, you ask your aids nothing. They will come to you and say that they've discovered something and explain just exactly what it is they've discovered or learned and exactly how it works and what it means. Then they ask you if you want to know about it. If you say "yes", then you've officially been iformed. If you say "no", then you haven't.
He's not just treating us like idiots Tina, it's much worse than that. He's playing us for the idiots we are.......:(
Thanks to this little discussion though, I had to go brush up on my hydrogen production stuff. I have to say first though, that I understand completely what you're saying Snowy. I would be surprised, shocked even, given your background, if you didn't know a thing or two about burning coal and generating energy. You've already set me straight once (thermal generators) remember...:)
Now, to hydrogen. This one's a Powerpoint presentation, sorry about that but it's a good presentation that shows the pros and cons quite well I thought...
Now, if you need something to lull you off to sleep tonight, here's a paper from CSIRO that really is quite good. It discusses how to use sunlight to make hydrogen and make it commercially viable at the same time. It even gets into the type of solar array you need. Good stuff.
Posted by snowy
I've been thinking about that, gryphonn. It seems to me that if the renewable options were attainable, then some venture capitalist would have jumped on the renewable band wagon ages ago. While they might not be environmentalists, they do understand profit, and the rewards would be massive for someone who could deliver the goods. Finally, the world has come to accept that global warming is a fact, so there is a massive pot of gold waiting there for someone who can deliver an environmentally acceptable energy solution.
The same applies to the incentive to overcome the coal and nuclear problems, although if the energy entrepeneurs think they can still maximise profits by doing nothing, then that is exactly what they will do.
I'm feeling rather despondent about the outcome at the moment, and fear that it will be nuclear. And yes, Tina, a change of government may help, although I'm not even convinced of that, even with current ALP policy. Unless there is a breakthrough with clean coal, then I think it will have to be nuclear, which I agree is a very dangerous path to go down. And if little lapdog Johnny wants to build one in his backyard, then that just may be poetic justice if it ever spews radioactive poison back at him.
Unless Plonka can invent something with hydrogen. So stop wasting time on whitepage, and get cracking!!!!
Posted by chica
...hard to get a word in edgewise here, I fear. But I did hear one quite enlightened comment - not sure who from - along the lines of: " We should hope that when 1.5bn Chinese people come home at night and turn on the lights, that they are not using power that is coal generated". Visit China and that will swim into perspective. But the answer is - buggered if I know!
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• Tuesday 22 January 2008 - Clean Coal v Nuclear v something a lot better
Posted by Strangely Perfect
The thing is that there is plenty of readily available energy for everyone in the world to share. 92 million miles away there's a continuous H-bomb going off which plasters the earth with the stuff. The laws of thermodynamics say that energy is neither created or destroyed - it's converted from one form to another.
Nature has done half the job for us in that it makes waves and wind from the energy of the sun's H-bomb. We can extract that energy and also, if we wanted, we could collect the spare heat with heat collectors and the spare light with photocells using current technologies. The economies of scale would see the unit cost for world-wide implementation plummet.
For transport we should use energy derived from but not necessarily using, electricity. Batteries and fuel cells are dangerous red herrings also. In fact, if people set their minds to converting all the suns energy to electricity instead of looking at the other red herrings of biofuels, coal,nuclear etc which are all temporary fixes, then we'd be a lot better off. The use of fuel from human food should be especially discouraged. The mere concept of it is bad,bad,bad.
Electricity has three benefits:
We've been handling it for over 100 years.
It's easily transportable with wires.
We can make anything from electricity...think about it.... gold, diamonds, computers, cars, food, bricks, pottery, ....
For portable energy (transport) we need to convert electricity into something. I like the air-powered car idea (look it up with the name Guy Negre). Also, hydrogen can be made from electricity and water etc. Although compressed tanks of the stuff seem a bit dodgy and metal hydride technology is overkill for a simple problem.
How to store all the electricity that will be needed? Simple; pump water up a hill and store the water in reservoirs. This is tried and tested technology. We just need to make a lot more. For the UK, at current energy consumption we'd need about three times as many. When electricity is needed, let it out, just like now, through generators. It'll go along the wires to where it's needed with minimum interaction (it's called a switch ;-) )
In short, the sooner we start doing these things and try to save our precious chemical feed-stocks for non-energy and non-transport uses, the better. After all, it took about 300 million years of sunlight to make all our fossil fuels. To burn them up in 300 years is foolish in the extreme.
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• Saturday 6 January 2007 - Time (of varying types) and a version of justice.
Has anyone else out there noticed a distinct lack of available spare time lately, or is it just me? I have so wanted to have the time to tell you all about the last few months, but it seems that every time I have a few spare minutes to snatch someone else beats me to them.
I'll get there though, in dribs and drabs. There's heaps to tell, so I've decided to break it all down and post a bit every now and then, as time permits. There will be an entry at some stage about the housing shortage around these parts at the moment... not to mention a 'special' entry about my (not) favourite bunch of real estate fools (but don't get me started on that one just yet). There's another couple of 'issues' that I'd like to have my say on too... current affairs, stupid governments, boring stuff like that. And I'll make an entry that will basically be just a general chat about what we've been up to, such as the fact that we still don't have a house and are presently camped (literally... tents and all) in our good friend's back yard. I've also got a heap of photos that I want to share. I've been accompanying my baby on a few work trips, so I have heaps of touristy-type shots of our neighbouring cities. Don't forget the nature shots... birds, birds galore, trees, vistas, sunsets and sunrises... you name it, I've probably got something to show you.
And so brings me to today's entry... a 'good news' kind of story that has been a hot topic of discussion of late, especially around these parts... the death of serial killer Leonard John Fraser. Now, normally I wouldn't rejoice in the death of a fellow human being, but this man was not human, in my eyes. The only sadness I felt when I heard of Fraser's death was the pang of regret that he hadn't been made to suffer more. Turst me, he deserved a lot more suffering before he was given death. He was evil personified, this man... the moment he died our world became a little more comfortable for the rest of us, even if we didn't all know it at the time. There will be many who will have sighed in relief when they read the headlines, just as I did. However, in cases like these, a natural death just doesn't seem to fit properly.
Now before I go much further, a bit of background. I was quite close to this case in a number of ways.. Firstly, this man lived in a block of units on the corner of the street where we lived. He moved in shortly before we moved out of that particular address, but I remember when he and his young girlfriend moved in. She was quite obviously intellectually impaired, and he was extremely loud and manipulative. Most of the time when she was with him she looked scared... like a rabbit in the headlights, so to speak... and at the time I suspected him of abusing her. This is why I remember so well. Secondly, this man's final victim, Keyra Steinhardt was a 9-year-old girl who attended the same school as my kids. She was the same age as my son, and her classroom was next to his. I remember her as a smiley-faced, well mannered little girl who we regularly passed on the way to school. At the time of her abduction, rape and murder I felt the sorrow of her passing, saw the reactions of her friends and schoolmates, teachers, neighbours and felt the disgusted rage that filled every other decent resident of the area... and I'm ashamed to admit that I also felt an immense relief that it hadn't been one of my children. If I hadn't been so adamant that I drive my kids to and from school every day, they would have walked an almost identical path to young Keyra. And if we hadn't moved from the street in which he lived, we would have had to walk past his front door every time we wanted to go to the corner shop. Thirdly, being a resident of the area in which his victims went missing, and being that I have always been concerned about violent criminals in the community, I made it my business to find out about this man and his crimes. I have some certain connections and I actually found out a lot more than I really wanted to... some of it so bad that it's been deemed never to be released to the general public. I won't do you all the injustice of forcing brutal facts upon you, but some of what I heard made me sick. At one murder scene the walls were splattered from floor to ceiling with the victim's blood... and this was by no means the worst by far. You'll just have to believe me when I say that this man was more monster than human. I'm glad that he's dead... it's justice, in a way... I guess.
This is one of those rare cases in which I believe capital punishment should most definately be used without hesitation. There was no mistaken identity here. Fraser was a psychopath who admitted to several murders and there is speculation about several other missing women. He has been jailed several times for violent crimes, including rape and abuse. Hard evidence, such as DNA, semen and blood samples have proven without a doubt that there was no mistake... and just in case anyone was still left wondering... he had been able to give police detailed descriptions of the locations in which he had dumped some of the bodies. There was no mistake. Leonard John Fraser was a predator whose crimes had been steadily increasing in severity before police arrested him. He deserved to die.
To those of his victims who remain... and there are lots out there that you wouldn't even think about... I wish you all the best. I hope you can rest a little easier now that he's gone.
And just in case there is a 'God'... thank you, Lord, for ridding us of this particular plague on humanity... but what the hell took you so long? And when are you going to start on all the rest of them??
Posted by catdog
thats the problem isn't it. No matter how many of them you get rid of, there will always be more ready to take their place.
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• Saturday 6 January 2007 - Yes, good riddance
Posted by snowy
I have read some of the sordid details. While I remain opposed to the death penalty, I can understand people asking why monsters like him should be allowed to live.
Barrie John Watts who murdered Shaun (sp?) Kingi could also be added to the list. He raped and murdered a lovely young 12 year old girl because he thought he needed a birthday present. I'd better stop there as I still get angry when I think about the sheer brutality of this animal.
Posted by tinacee
Cat... that's all too true, unfortunately. It's a hard one, isn't it? But sometimes I wonder why we have to put up with these animals.
Snowy... it's Sian Kingi... just to be pedantic and correct your spelling... but let's not forget Valmae Beck. She was just as involved and is just as guilty as Barrie Watts. And what is worse, after all? The man who has the equipment to rape a little girl, or the woman who went along with him and helped him to rape and murder her with no remorse at all? They planned the crime together and they committed it together... how's that for a bonding experience?
Sometimes it makes you wonder why we don't punish these types of criminals in a like manner? Kill and be killed... Rape and be raped... Deny another person their basic human rights and lose all claim to your own. Why not hand the perpetrator over to the families of the victims? That would be sweet justice, and it would scare the bejeezus out of the criminal, wouldn't it? What would most grieving parents do to the man who raped and murdered their little girl, given a few moments alone with him? Wouldn't that HAVE to make criminals stop and think about whether they really want to commit that particular crime? The current justice system doesn't do much to deter them... it doesn't seem to be either fair or adequate enough sometimes... most of the time, actually... at least that's my belief.
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• Saturday 6 January 2007 - Valmae Beck
Posted by snowy
Yes, she was mother and grandmother herself, so you'd have thought she'd have had some compassion for the little girl. I believe she changed her name to Fay Crump or something, ready for when she is released. She and Pauline Hanson buddied up while Hanson was in jail. Which doesn't surprise me at all...
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• Monday 8 January 2007 - Hmmmm.....
Posted by tinacee
And doesn't that say a lot?
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• Friday 20 April 2007 - Untitled Comment
Posted by Anonymous
It is actually Fay Cramb and after spending time with Hanson she was transferred to Townsville Womens, where I had the pleasure of meeting this thing. Many of us were happy with it and fortunately I was shortly moved to the low security part of the prison, and did not have nothing to do with her. Only days before it arrived I was living in the hut (group of 6 cells), which it then moved into. Many people after leaving her section to come to mine, then had the nerve to stick up for her and say that she didn't deserve to be treated the way she was treated. I can not tell you how this argument made me feel inside, it felt as if they didn't care about what happened to that poor child. I want to let you all know though that there will be no chance of that women being given parole. Whilst in prison I had the chance to speak to a few screws which had been given information about her and that she could try as many times as she wished to get parole, however, her attempts would be effortless.
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Hey... guess where I am??? Go on, I bet you can't!!
Oh ok, I'm at Tracy's place. This is because we're going to pick her and her stuff up and take them back to Rockhampton with us. She's finally decided to come back to the city of the 'hell lights' to be closer to family. The high rental prices in Mackay might have had a little something to do with it too, but I prefer to think that it was my influence... all me!!! Bwa ha ha ha ha.
We hired the truck this afternoon and embarked on the three hour roadtrip to get here. Oh yay and much joy. You spend three hours lockedin a moving car with a 15 year old boy, a packet of chips and a bottle of ginger ale and just see if it doesn't drive you at least a bit loopy.
Oh, and now that we've decimated her waning food stocks, the kids are running around the yard in a very noisy fashion. Oh well... we might as well leave the neighbours with a good impression...
Well, I might leave it there for tonight. I think I'm going to go and fall down somewhere soon. We'll have to get up early tomorrow morning, load the truck and head back home. I just had to let you all know how much fun we're having.
Posted by cc1804
Ahhh, nothing like being a captive audience in a car with kids...lol
Good luck with the packing and moving and safe travelling back home tomorrow.
(And of course Tracey is heading back there just because of you...who wouldn't? lol)
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• Monday 2 October 2006 - Yes, Good Luck For The Move
Posted by horse
hey guys.... im that 15 year old with tina and i wasnt that bad. it was worse being in the car with mum cause she hogged the 2way all the time...it was boring and we have another trip 2morrow, buthoppefully it will be more fun with tracy comming
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• Sunday 15 October 2006 - ^_^
Posted by klarth
This blog is by far the most interesting one to read on whitepage. Keep up the good work ;)
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Just a carry on from yesterday. It started sometime in the early hours, and kept up all day. It was a misty, drizzly kind of rain most of the time... the kind of rain that is not really rain, but enough to be annoying. I managed to check the rain guage during a bit of a lull at about 5 pm, and we'd had eleven and a half mls. I just went out again, and we had another eighteen mls overnight. Almost thirty mls in just over 24 hours, that's not bad... especially for an area like this. Rain is usually much needed in these parts. Being a warmer and drier area, it's usually welcomed with open arms... unless you're a goat. Then it's time to hide. I don't blame them either. Have you ever smelled wet goat?
A bit of a puddle on our driveway...
Raindrops on a leaf in the puddle...
My footprint...
And nature's jewels...
But I just saw my daughter off to work, so I have that slight feeling of concern. Not because of her driving... I know that she's a good driver. She's also aware of how much I worry about her, and she keeps that in mind when she drives, bless her little heart. It's just the 'she's my daughter and she's out there driving a car in the rain' thing. My mind is racing (could it be lack of sleep? Maybe) in a thousand different directions, and I just thought I'd let some of it out.
Our road, as I've mentioned before, is a dirt road. Well actually, it's mostly clay, which is nearly as good as tarmac to drive on... when it's dry. It's damned slippery when it's as soaked as it is at the moment. I've already driven on it today... I had to drop Gryph off to work earlier... so I guess the memory's a bit clearer at the moment. Do any of you remember those little round boat-type efforts that you steer with a joystick in the middle of the boat. I remember when I was a kid, that we used to visit this little water park on the Sunshine Coast that had them. I don't remember what the place was called... and that's not the point anyway. They were near on impossible to steer in a straight line... and our road makes me think of them. That's what it's like to drive on it while it's wet. All four wheels want to go their own way. It's kind of scary.
Anyway, I'll be back... I have to take LM8 to school. Don't go away.
Slip-slidin' away... slip-slidin' awa-a-a-ay....
Well, I didn't see M18's car along the way, so at least I know that she made it past the dirt. Besides, I rang her when she didn't text me (hmm... yes dear, you bad). That's a weight off my shoulders. I took a quick photo on the way to school to show you what our road looks like when it's been raining. This is the view down the road from on top of the hill in front of our place. You can also see where someone's already gone off the side of the road this morning... those tracks weren't there when I came back through early this morning.
From the other side... There's no wreckage, and you can see that they've come straight
back onto the road... so that's good. Goes to show how slippery it is
though.
I'm wondering who it was (yeah, I know... I'm a big Dorrie). The only people who drive on this road are us, our neighbours, our other neighbours (the bigger kids going down to the bus stop) and the postie. It wasn't the postie, because he drives a 4WD (you can see his tracks, they're the thicker ones). It got me thinking that it might have been the kid from up the road. I suppose it would be a learning experience though, wouldn't it? Whoever it was I'll bet they left tracks... and I'm not talking about on the road. They would have seen that
guide post coming towards them, and their little heart would have been
fluttering. And that in turn got me thinking about a recent post that Ninja put up about safe driving. Being that I used to work in the driver training industry, I made a couple of comments about my ideas on learning to drive. The system just doesn't sufficiently prepare young drivers for emergency situations like this. I have always strongly advocated for it to become mandatory for learner drivers to complete a defensive driving course before they take their practical driving test. That would improve the standard of driving by allowing them more practical experiences to relate to. Oh, there's so many ways we could improve the system... and I don't feel like typing all of that again... Have a read here.
Anyway... daughter's safely at work, and all is good with the world.
Apart from the things that I need to do... sorting, packing, cleaning, etc. Speaking of which... I think I've put it off for long enough now. I promised myself that I would knuckle down today, so I'm off. Toodles.
*Mumbling* Oh joy, oh joy. Now where is that Greenday CD... I need some working music.
Posted by catdog
Hi there, I have a teenage daughter who has her L plates and she could get her P's but doesn't want to. Everyone keeps hassling her to get them but she says she doesn't want to as she doesn't feel confident driving. I am much happier for her to not have them than to be driving with no confidence. I agree a defensive driving course should be seriously considered by all p platers. Being in the country on country roads can be nervewracking once your kids and their friends get cars!!
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• Friday 1 September 2006 - Untitled Comment
Posted by tinacee
Well, she should be allowed the freedom to choose. If she doesn't think that she's ready, it's no use pushing her into it.
Defensive driving courses are good for city kids too. Accidents happen anywhere and everywhere. They should be prepared.
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Something different for a change... and I'm putting this one up even though I know that there are people out there who'll scoff at me. Some of you may be aware of the oracle set that Blackrose has been busily making recently. I've been watching with interest (albeit somewhat sporadically) as the set came together, marvelling at the intricacies of her scrimshawing. Then when she asked for people who were willing to act as guinea pigs to see just how close her oracle was, I agreed.
Now, I've always had a belief in 'the powers of the universe', if you will. I have a belief in astrology, I have experienced the healing powers of crystals first hand, and I have had so much experience with people with psychic abilities that I can't discount it's validity. Now, I'm not one of those who go along to every psychic expo or 'fortune teller'... I think that on the whole there are more frauds in the psychic and/or holistic industry than those with a true calling. But I also accept that there are people who have 'the gift'... or 'the curse', depending on who you ask and the extent of their abilities. In this case, I probably only agreed to the reading as a bit of fun... but I was kind of spun out a bit. And after thinking about the results my perception of our current situation has changed somewhat. I feel much better after reading the wise words of Carole's oracle. Perhaps it was just the power of suggestion... but even if that's all it is... it's got to be a good thing to be able to look on the bright side rather than wallow in your own misery... hasn't it?
I asked the question, "How will our move go?" I just thought that I'd like to post her interpretation of the reading as she sent it to me. You make up your own mind... and if you'd like her to ask her oracle a question on your behalf, she has told me that she is happy to help.
This is the message she sent to me after the reading...
Hi Tina!
I just did your reading for you. Here's what came out of it. The stones represent the immediate "question" at hand, the bone tiles show the attitudes and behaviors of the people involved, and the tree tiles is somewhat the "solution" or wise wisdom from the Green People.
Stones Heart (the ties that bind) - Triskele (the forward momentum) - Cow (finances and material possessions)
Right away, I can tell that there was soooo much invested in the house you guys are currently living in, and I don't necessarily mean financially. The Heart stone represents the love and nurture that is attached to it. The Triskele represents movement and change... Moving forward or moving away. The Cow is self explanatory (the house.) Because the Triskele is in the middle (between the heart and the cow,) I sense that this "movement" is very reluctant. The attachment is very strong!
Animal tiles (I felt the need to pull out two tiles... One for you and hubby.) Snake and Otter
I'm not sure "who is who" in here, so maybe you can make clear it up for me. Snake is someone who is a survivor who adapts to any circumstances. Doesn't mean it welcomes them with open arms, though... Don't tread on Snake or you'll get bitten! Stubborn, resilient, intense and impulsive... That's Snake. A person who is inheritantly distrustful of anything or anyone until proven otherwise. Introverted and sensitive (even thought emotions are not shown up front.) Snake can be very stubborn at times, and this stubborness can kill its spirit (a snake will suffocate if it doesn't rub off its dead skin ASAP!) Snake teaches to "let go" of the old and come out anew. Otter is an extrovert... A congenial, fun-loving person who has rather humanistic views of the world. Can come across as unconventional and eccentric at times, but nevertheless, a kind and friendly soul who's reform-conscious, dynamic and full of imagination. Otter is rather independant and does its own thing when it wants to. Its main problem is that everything is "fun" and it's hard for Otter to "buckle down" and focus when it's optimism and freedom loving attitude has been dampened. Otter can become tactless, dour and reclusive. Like Snake, Otter also has a VERY stubborn streak which can hamper its progress out of its depressive mood.
Tree tile Birch
The Birch tree is the first tree to regrow in a harvested forest. It is a pioneer! A birch forest is a young forest, full of promise and potential. The gleaming whiteness of its bark stands out like a sore thumb within a forest, and so it offers guidance and vision. Birch shows the way to a new horizon... New beginnings! Take the Birch's advice and look towards the new!
From what I could gather from this reading, you guys feel disheartened by the need to move to another house after investing so much in this one, but don't let those feelings stop you... The stubborness will suffocate Snake and drown Otter! The strong love that you have is not linked to the house itself but to each other. You guys have very fond memories and attachment to the place, but it's simply because of the love that YOU have put into it, TOGETHER. You can do it again somewhere else... The common denominator is you, your family, and the love you guys have for each other. I reckon that if you lived in a teepee, this same loving attachment would permeate it. You guys make it happen. Don't let assholes such as "Chrome Dome" quelch your dreams... Don't let it kill the love. Take your love somewhere else where it will flourish, yet once more, and create a home out of a house. I know you worry about your daughter because she loved the place so much, but her little intuitive heart will sense this same love and "belonging" in any house, regardless where it is, as long as you guys are both there with her.
GAWD! I sounds like a bloody awful Hallmark card!!! LOL! I hope this helps Snake and Otter! ;) Lemme know if I'm in the ballpark or if I'm full of shyte... Any feedback will let me know how accurate my oracle is! And if you got any questions too, just fire away!
Cheers, luvey! Carole.
The following is the message I sent back to her. This is how I myself have interpreted this reading.
Woah... Ok, I'm going to need a minute. This has knocked me a bit. I was even on the verge of tears for a second or two... but good tears, not bad ones. This is sooooo true.
I couldn't answer right away because I had to go pick my daughter up from school. And it gave me the chance to think about the reading. It's surprising how true it's come out to be... well, no not surprising, I believe strongly in this kind of stuff. Maybe I didn't really expect too much because of all the bullshit artists that I've met over the years. It's a bit trippy though to see it all there. I think I'm going to have to start looking at this whole thing differently. Enough feeling sorry for us... time to get into it and start fighting for what's right. Also time to look forward. There's obviously something good over the horizon for us.
Anyway, you wanted some feedback. This is what I've come up with.
Firstly, the stones. Well... I think they're the most apt ones for us at the moment. Heart... yep, that could be either the love we have together or the love of the land. I can't really decide completely. Maybe it's both. Triskele... of course there's the momentum of moving. We all know that's got to happen. The cow is what got me... finances. That's the big thing at the moment. The thing that is the hardest to deal with. If that was looking better, I think that things would be a lot easier. We'd be all good if the landlord had lived up to his promise and paid us what he owes us. But since he's denying everything it's left us with no finances at all, really. Anyway... Slightly trippy there.
Now, the animal stones... At first, as I was reading about the snake, I thought "Well, that's got to be me... I guess I'm a survivor, and I can bite when I need to. Stubborn, resilient, intense and impulsive... that's me too. Sometimes distrustful... yep... and sensitive... yep... but not really what I'd call introverted. I'm not really an 'out there' person, but I don't mind mixing with the right kind of person and having a good time. "Maybe" I thought "that's Gryph". He's a lot like me... amazingly so, so it's not a surprise that he has all of those traits too... and he's a bit more of an introvert than I am. Then I read about the otter... Extroverted... I'm not sure if I'm that either, but I kind of am. It could just be recent circumstances that have made me more introverted than I normally would be. Congenial, fun-loving, humanistic views of the world... yep. Unconventional and eccentric at times.... who me? Kind and friendly (well, I would hope so) reform-conscious...yep... dynamic (doesn't feel like it sometimes, but yeah, I guess, essentially) and full of imagination... yep, too much bloody imagination, that's my problem. Independant... not so much any more, but I've had to be most of my life... everything is fun (well, it should be anyway), and it's hard to buckle down and focus, etc... well... yep. Tactless, dour and reclusive... been there too. Stubborn and depressive... yep again. Then I started thinking that they could both be me. In a way they both describe me... I do have a split nature, you know... it's the gemini in me... the split personality. But the more I think about it, the more I'm convinced that Gryph is the snake. That's torn it. I'm the otter. Damn... somehow I thought I'd be something more dangerous, like a wolf or a mountain lion... even something regal like an eagle or a horse... but an otter...... oh well, it could have been worse (by the way, I am joking... damn again... more otter traits).
Finally, the Birch tree... new growth. How much more apt could that be for us. We've both grown so much and so quickly with each other. We should look at this as a good thing. The new is to be looked forward to, instead of feared. I will take the Birch's advice, I think. New horizons... that sounds good to me. Kind of scary, but it could be fun... and I don't want to miss out on the good things we might find there.
Now, your interpretation sounds about right too... We have been disheartened by this move, and you're right... it's not the place that matters, but the love within it. I don't think that's going to change. As for the teepee... yes please... sounds fantastic... I think we'd love it... especially if it came with a rainforest or something similar. And the kids, of course. To take off and live with nature, all together in happy harmony... how beautiful that would be. As for our daughter and her school... yes, she loves it, and yes, she will make the change ok if we need to... she's a strong and resilliant person too. I just hate to do it to her. Not only does she love it there, but everyone at the school loves her just as much. She feels safe and comfortable. If we have to move I just hope she can go to another school that's similar to this one, and I hope she likes it just as much.
So there you go. I think your oracle is pretty spot on. I can't wait until Gryph comes home and has a look at the reading. I want to get his opinions on it all. I think he'll come to the same conclusion though.
Thanks Carole. You don't know how much I needed to hear all of this. I know where I'm going to go when I need more guidance... straight back here to you. xx
Lots of love to you, oh wise one. Take care.
Yep, it could all be shyte. I could just be another example of a person who wants to hear that something good is waiting to happen to them. But how much different is that from those who follow a main-stream religion? There is something to say about the peace of mind attained by communing with nature and following the basic laws of the universe... peace, love, brown rice and all of that. Not that I'm going to go out and start a hippy commune (even though that would be pretty cool)... or start worshipping a Wikka god and casting spells on all and sundry... or visiting Stonehenge so that I can dance around naked in the moonlight with a bunch of other 'holistic crazies'. But I have had a long hard look at what's possible... the good and the bad... and I've decided that I want to aim towards the good and put the bad behind me. Like the Birch tree... forget the devastation and move on to greater heights. That's GOT to be a good thing for all of us.
Thanks again Carole. Not just for your oracle, but for your wise words of quiet and caring encouragement. You are a legend.
I needed a bit of a break from the parerwork for a mo. Yep, getting there, as far as The Chat Room is concerned. We've had a couple more offers of help, and I've had a few requests for 'Friend Membership' already too. Unfortunately though, there are still a few things that we need to sort out before we can start properly. But the head's spinning, and starting to hurt, so I thought I'd stop for a bit and take my mind off it.
So, I put some eggs on to boil (yep, curried egg sandwiches for lunch again... Mmmmm), and now I'm sitting and waiting. I thought that I'd take this chance to add another entry here.... but what to write??? My eye falls on Little Miss 8's school newsletter. There's a reminder about the Interschool Sports Carnival next week... and that gave me this idea. She's a wonderfully athletic child... always has been... always on the go... bordering on hyperactive even. And fast... even before she started school she could beat kids 2 or 3 years older than her in a foot race. But every time a sports carnival comes around I thank my lucky stars... it's sometimes kind of surprising considering that just over a year ago we were worried that she might not ever be able to walk again properly, let alone run or jump. So let me tell you a story...
It was Easter Monday last year... LM8 (not quite 7 at the time) had just learned how to ride her pushbike without training wheels that very day. She was so proud of herself... so proud that she nagged and nagged me to take her over to Gryph's place (we weren't living together then) so that she could show him... and since it was school holidays, his daughter too (Little Miss 9). I knew it was really her that LM8 wanted to see more than anything. These two girls have been best friends since birth... well, since LM8's birth, anyway. LM9 was 18 months old (to the day) when LM8 was born. Since Gryph and his ex were two of our best friends the girls grew up being very close to each other. LM9 would sit and watch LM8 for ages, even then... even at 18 months old... just sit and stare... occasionally stroke her hair, or giggle at her. I think LM9 was the first person that LM8 ever smiled at. Their friendship is pretty amazing... and becoming sisters hasn't affected it at all. They rarely fight with each other even now... it's the noisy giggles, the mischief and the cheekiness that they get in trouble for, rather than arguments. Anyway, now I've gotten off track again.
I didn't really need much urging to go visit Gryph. So we packed her little red bike into the boot of the car and headed off. At the time we lived about 7km (I think... about that anyway) away from each other. There was 2 ways to get to his place. The first was a paved road that went along the highway, then along a narrow winding road over a small hilly range. I didn't like going this way because the narrow road used to make me a little nervous. The other way was along a lovely little dirt road that wound through some beautiful scenery. I preferred this road... it was quieter, it was shorter, and it was a much more pleasant drive. I travelled this way almost every time I went to his place (unless I'd just washed the car and wanted to keep it clean).
It was about 5:30pm when we left my place, the sun was low and I knew the kangaroos would be out and foraging along the sides of the road for their evening meal, so I took it easy that day. I didn't mind driving a bit slower, the scenery was lovely, and the trip didn't take long anyway. We'd just come around a bend, I'd just shifted up into third and was heading up the tiniest of crests when it happened. The hill is barely perceivable, even when you walk the road (which I've done), but there's just enough of a dip on the other side that I didn't see the other car coming. I got about two second's warning before we hit head-on... just enough to see the other car's headlights rise over the hill... and to realise that it was Gryph's car that I was about to slam into.
It's amazing how quick the mind can work in a situation like that actually... the amount of information that can pass through it in a matter of two seconds. I remember recognising the car. I thought about how he had his daughter over for the holidays. I thought about how she sometimes didn't sit in her seat belt properly. I thought to myself "Oh fuck, this is bad." I hoped that I wasn't about to kill one of them, or one of us. I realised that there was nowhere I could go as there was a high verge on my left and a couple of big trees on my right. I knew that if I had had the room and we had both turned in opposite directions, we still didn't have enough time anyway. I thought "Fuck this road for being so narrow." I got a visual image of how the car would have flipped if I'd hit the wall on my left. And another image of the car slamming into the trees on my right. I kicked myself for not taking the other road. I counted myself lucky that I hadn't been 'hooning', as (I'm ashamed to say it) I sometimes did. I thought "That'd be right, there goes my new car." "That'd be right, just when I found someone who treats me like I'm something special." "How am I going to get the kids to school now." "Why did I have to come over just now?" "Why didn't I ring first to say that I was on the way." "What am I going to do if I kill him?" I saw the sun shining off his windscreen and realised that I couldn't even see into the car. I felt so sad and so worried that I might not ever open my eyes to look at him again. I was more worried that he might not ever open his eyes to look at me again. Then I felt like such a shit for thinking of that first when I thought that one or both of the kids might not ever open their eyes again. I braked (and I have very good reflexes), but I knew that there just wasn't time to stop, no matter how hard I tried. I realised that we were going to crash, and I knew that it was going to be bad. And I thought "Fuck, this is going to be bad." That thought kept running through my mind, over (or through) all of the other thoughts that were bombarding me at the same time. I barely had time to grit my teeth. We hit head-on, and it was lucky that we did, in a way. The cars were nose to nose, the bars of the chassies hitting each other and stopping both cars dead in their tracks. If the cars had hit to the side, both would have been spun around and spat off into the trees/verge, and things would have been much worse.
I think I lost consciousness for a split second... I think it was the airbag that knocked me out (damn they hurt when they hit you full force)... but it probably saved my life too. We weren't really going that fast, about 50 k/h each, I guess... maybe a little more, but not much. This figure I worked out because, as I said, I'd just come around a bend and I distinctly remember just changing up into third gear. But, as I also said, neither of us had time to brake (not enough to change our speed, at least), and 50 + 50 = 100. So, as the police told me later, the impact was roughly the same as hitting a brick wall at 100ks. I remember waking up with that groggy thought that it was all a dream... then I saw the other car, nose to nose with mine. It was about then that I realised that I could also hear LM8 screaming. That sound was the worst thing I have ever heard in my life. I was afraid to look around, but I did... I couldn't not.
She'd been sitting in the middle seat in the back. She'd been wearing a belt, but it was one of those lap-sash seatbelts. Somehow I knew even before I saw her exactly what had happened... not that I could tell by looking at her at first. But I remember having another visual image pop into my head... On impact, she'd been thrown forward, she had begun to slip up out of the belt... but then her leg had caught on the seat, and the belt had grabbed and held her. It had stopped her from flying out the windscreen, but it had broken her leg at the very top of her femur. She was sitting in the seat and looked rather normal, but she was screaming... "My leg, my leg, my leg...." Now, she's a tough cookie, that kid, and that screaming left no doubt in my mind as to what had happened.
At the same time, I remembered a story I'd heard about how a car blew up after a crash because the ignition had been left on. I reached down to turn off the ignition (even though the car had already stalled, but I didn't think of that at the time), and as I did I looked back at Gryph's car. The sun was still shining on the windscreen and I still couldn't see into the car, but then the driver's door swung open and I thought "Oh good, he's ok." I reached for the door handle and pushed... and nothing happened. The crash had crumpled the front guard, pushing it up against the outside of my door and it wouldn't open. I panicked a little... well, not really panicked... my survival/protection instincts had kicked in, I guess. I turned my body and kicked at the door. I remember kicking it three times... hard... then it flew open. I got out, and looked up the road. I remember thinking that someone else could come along and slam into the back of my car. In hindsight, that wasn't very likely to have happened... we were on top of a little rise, and anyone coming from either side would have seen us in plenty of time to stop. But at the time I didn't think of that... I felt that I had to get LM8 out of the car, but I knew that her leg was broken by now, and I didn't want to move her. What should I do? Gryph would tell me... he'd just recently updated his first aid certificate, so it was obvious that I should ask him.
I looked back at Gryph's car again, just in time to see that the driver's door had swung back closed... no one had gotten out, and there was no noise coming from the car... no crying... no screams of pain... no moaning... nothing. My heart leapt... almost stopped. The sun was still shining on the windscreen and I still couldn't see into the car. I was torn... what should I do now? I couldn't leave my daughter... but then again, she was alive... she was in pain, but she wasn't going to die. Someone else might need me more. I climbed into the back of my car and tried to calm LM8 as much as I could. I told her that I needed to see if anyone was hurt in the other car. I promised that I wasn't going anywhere else and that I would only take a minute. She was still crying, very loudly, but she'd stopped screaming, and she understood what I had said. She looked at me and said "Yes. Just hurry up." I remember feeling very very proud of her at that moment in time. I kissed her and left her in the back seat of the car. I was still worried about another car coming along, but there was nothing else that I could do.
I ran to Gryph's car. As I reached the passenger door I realised that it wasn't him driving... it was his housemate, K. I have never felt so much relief in all my life... and I've never felt so revolted in myself. I was so glad that it wasn't Gryph, but K was kind of slumped over the wheel... he was hurt and all I could feel was relief. As I opened the door he lifted his head and shook it a bit. There was blood on the back of his head. There had been a large rock in the back hatch of the car. It had flown forward in the crash, broken the latch that held the back seat up and hit him in the back of the head, knocking him out. I didn't know that at the time, I found out later. It was amazing that it hadn't killed him, really. I reached over and turned off the car, then made him look at me and asked him a couple of quick questions. He was groggy, but he answered me, so he was alright. I left him to get out of the car by himself and went back to my daughter. It was about here that I realised that my little finger was sticking out at a weird angle, and that my chest hurt like an elephant had kicked me.
I used K's mobile (I had no credit... I'd thought about that too in those two seconds before we hit) to call Gryph. I had the presence of mind to realise that the nearest ambulance station was at least a half an hour away, whereas Gryph was only 5 minutes up the road. He'd be able to use K's work ute (a lumbering lump of F-100) to come and pick us up, and we'd be at the ambulance station before the ambulance could have found us. He told us he'd be right there. In the next ten minutes or so, the sun went down. It was almost dusk... that funny time of day when the sun was down, it was still light, but not... you know? I was still worried about another car coming along... it was probably the most foremost thought in my mind at that stage. By the time Gryph got to us I had LM8 out of the car and was sitting on the side of the road with her on my lap. By that time, I also knew for certain that her leg was broken... I'd seen it swinging oddly when I took her out of the car. I held it as straight as I could when I carried her, but she still cried whenever I moved. She wasn't screaming any more, only crying... this worried me a lot. I'd almost convinced myself that there was something very very wrong with her... although it was only bravery... she's always been like that.... stiff upper lip... no use crying over spilt milk... screaming won't make it hurt any less... you know? On the whole, I still can't believe how brave she was.
Well, anyway, to cut a long story short. We drove to the ambulance station. The ambulance took us to the hospital. I remember telling them that her leg was broken, but they assumed that because she wasn't screaming I was over-reacting. They seemed more interested in treating my dislocated finger than her broken leg. I didn't even tell them about my chest (there was nothing broken, I was reasonably sure) because I suspected that they would ignore her completely if I did. I'll admit I wasn't very patient with them. I told them that it was just her way, but I saw the way they looked down their noses. I told them that I was refusing any treatment until they'd x-rayed her leg. So they did, just to shut me up, I think. While she was in there they pulled my finger back into place and bandaged it to a metal plate. 15 minutes later they told me what I had already known... her leg was broken. They booked her into hospital and gave her lots of drugs that knocked her out. It was after she was asleep that I went to check out my chest. I went to the bathroom and stripped off my shirt. I had massive bruising where the seat belt had caught me... red, blue, purple, and even yellow by this time. I was pretty... rainbow coloured. It was then that I also noticed that the buckle on the belt I'd been wearing (it was rather large and square) had been bent... doubled over... by the force of my body pushing against the seat belt.
The next afternoon the doctor came to see us. My ex was there by then, naturally. He told us that the break was clean, but in a very bad spot. Being so close to her hip, they couldn't put it in plaster. We had two choices. 1... they could put her in traction (for at least three months) and hope that the break healed cleanly. If it hadn't (and that happens quite often where kids and traction is concerned, apparently) there was the chance that she would have a limp for the rest of her life... maybe never even regain the full use of the leg at all. Choice no. 2... they could operate on her and put a plate in her leg which would hold the bone in the correct position. There was no choice, as far as I was concerned... three months in a hospital bed would have killed her... or at least driven her crazy. I opted for the operation. My ex, however... he didn't want the operation. His reasons... it was dangerous... she might have been allergic to the medication and she might not wake up (a valid worry, I guess) .... but also, he didn't want her to have to live with a large scar on her leg. "How will she ever be able to wear a bikini when she grows up?" was the way he put it... WTF?? And she would have looked great if she'd been forced to limp everywhere anyway, wouldn't she? I asked the doctor if he needed her father's approval to do the operation. He looked at my ex a little worriedly and admitted that no, he only needed the approval of one of her parents. I told him that I'd sign the paperwork. My ex went off... yelled and swore at me... called me a terrible mother... even threatened to sue me, as if that would have worried me... then proceeded to abuse the doctor. The operation proceeded regardless. It took roughly 5 hours (when they told me it would take a maximum of three). It was a very stressful time... made even worse by having my ex in the same room... and being too afraid to go outside for a smoke in case they came to get me. But it was the best thing in the end.
A week after the accident she took her first walk on crutches. Two weeks after the accident she was almost running on them. She was walking unaided within a month... even though the doctor had told her that she shouldn't have been using the leg. I tried to stop her, but as I said, the kid is hyperactive... try to stop a cyclone. Four months after the accident she participated in her first sport's day. She came third (at her last school there were about 70 kids her age) in her age group's foot race. She really is a very inspirational little girl. I really believe that 3 months in traction would have broken her
spirit... and if she'd lost the ability to run and jump... well, I don't know. I just know that I'm so glad I hadn't allowed her father to bully me on
that one.
So, that quick story that I was going to write while the eggs were boiling turned into a whole novel again, didn't it? But the point of it was this... next Friday I think I'll be heading off to Marlborough for the Interschool Sports Carnival. She'll do well even if I'm not there... I'm sure of that... but I want to go along and see her compete anyway. Because I know how much she loves her sport... and because I know she'd like me to be there... and because I'm so proud of her. But probably mostly because it's something that under other circumstances (had things gone differently) she might not have been able to do at all. Another one of those things to be grateful for, I guess.
Posted by Rinny
Oh My God.
It's easy to think of human beings as being fragile creatures. I am amazed at peoples' strength and capacity to overcome such trauma and physical damage, and yet still retain a philosophical and positive outlook on life.
Stories like that really put things into perspective. Thankyou for sharing it.
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• Friday 4 August 2006 - I relived that story as you told it.
Posted by kittyrex
Tina, you are a terrific writer. I've got goosebumps from that and tears as well.
I could almost FEEL the emotions running through you as you had the crash. I was with you in and out of the car, controlling yourself, functioning, advocating for your daughter, and reliving the emotions.
That has to be one of the best bits of writing I've ever read.
Posted by cc1804
Oh my....
I got the goosebumps as well, I could just imagine being there.
just makes you realise how a split second could quite easily change everything.
You know you guys have so many angels looking out for you.
And as for your little girl - what an inspiratonal kid!
Hope she gets out there at the carnival and does brilliantly!!
CC
Permanent Link
• Sunday 6 August 2006 - Untitled Comment
Posted by Isobelle
I hope you will never know just how lucky you were! A terrific read! Thanks for sharing. I like curried egg sandwiches too, I hope you eventually got yours!
Love all your photos too!
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• Sunday 6 August 2006 - Just replies
Posted by tinacee
Rinny, yes the human body is fragile, but the human spirit can indeed be very strong. I think that in many cases (not all, but many) the strength of one's spirit is only enhanced by the bad things that we endure. Often those of us who were lucky enough to have been born 'with a silver spoon in our mouthes', and/or those who live privelleged lives don't appreciate the blessings that we have. All too often they think that their lives are falling apart when the tiniest thing goes wrong. But those who have suffered a truly momentous wrong learn that even the tiniest things can be blessings. I do try to keep that perspective in mind, it's important, I think.
Kitty, I didn't mean to make you cry, but thank you for doing so. All I really wanted to do was share the reasons behind my appreciation for what she can still do... but I got carried away again, as I tend to do. :o)
CC, she is a pretty brilliant kid. She will do well, I have no doubt about that. To look at her now you wouldn't know that she'd endured that. Her bone has mended perfectly, but yes, she does have a large scar that runs down the outside of her leg from her hip to about half way to her knee. It's lucky she's such a tom-boy because she's so proud of it that she'll happily show it off to anyone who's interested. She still has yet to have the plate removed, but there is no real hurry as that part of the leg bone doesn't grow too much until puberty. She's actually looking forward to that operation and hassles me about when it's going to be done quite regularly.
And Isobelle, thanks for the comment. I do realise how lucky we are. I thank my lucky stars for it every time I have to yell at my daughter to get down out of a tree, or not jump so high on a trampoline. Sometimes I think of how it could have been and it makes me so thankful. Yes, I got my curried egg sandwiches... they would have been a bit nicer if we'd have lettuce to go on them... but oh well. Oh, and your poems are lovely. I have been meaning to comment, but I never quite feel worthy. Poetry is too civilised for me to get my head around :o)
I just had to say thank you to Ice654 for deleting one of his entries... no, that's not what I mean. It's not the deleting that I want to thank him for... it's the dignity of the apology. He had some heart-felt words to say about the emotion that his entry caused, and that impressed me. The fact that he was willing to stand up and say "Hey, I'm not perfect, and that wasn't in the best of taste" is quite impressive. I just wanted to be fair and say that.
Ice, I do understand what you were saying though. It wouldn't necessarily be fair to re-try someone who has been found innocent of a crime. But then, there are certain circumstances when we have to ask ourselves if it really is necessary. I guess that being found guilty then getting off on a technicality is something that should make us ask just that. It's a thin line to walk, I guess. And unfortunately, emotion plays a big part in the decisions we make in our lives. Just like the way we would react when faced with a horrible accident. It's all good to sit back and say "This is what I'd do..." but when push comes to shove, it rarely turns out the way we think. Shock, sorrow, revenge, anger, confusion... all of these things affect us, and change our perspectives to a certain degree. Such is life. And such is being human.
Anyway, thanks Ice. It was good of you to realise that something you said hurtful to someone else. Apologising publicly was admirable, and I'm sure the family would appreciate the gesture too. Take care.
Well, I suppose this is essentially a hang-over from a comment I made on one of Gryph's posts. I don't usually make too many comments on the state of our political system, but I wanted to put my two cents worth in here. I was moved to do this because of one of the other comments, one by Tigerlily. She suggested that we should only elect someone to the office of Prime Minister if they've served the country as a part of the defense force or police force. With all respect, I think I'd like to beg to differ. I tried to justify my point of view by leaving a short comment (well, a rather long one I suppose, as far as comments go) but then I decided that I'd like to expand a little on the comment I made.
Now firstly... It would seem to be a good idea to put someone into power based on the idea that they had served in a war and therefore are aware of the human damage that causes. However, it's the career soldier mentality that would worry me. All too often when things get hard for an army man he begins to think that the best course of action would be to blow something up. All too often you find that they are too ready to over-react to certain circumstances rather than sit down and really think about the best course of action. Oh, I know that there are exceptions, but they seem to be quite few and far between. Add to that the 'she'll be right mate' attitude that many of us Aussies tend to have and you could end up with a country that's knee-deep in kaka before we know it.
By that, I mean... some people just can't be bothered to check into the validity of a candidates ideas and policies before they vote. There would be a lot of people who would simply say 'Well, he's an army man, so he must be alright', and vote for him on that basis. It happens all the time... at the moment many people have a preference for a party and simply vote for that party's candidate without checking on whether or not his priorities mesh with their own. Other people have an absolute disdain for another party, so would rather cut off their own ear than vote for a candidate that that party nominates. I don't know how many times I've heard that in the run-up to an election in the past... 'So who are you voting for Bill?' 'Labor mate, they're the only party that will look after the working man.' 'So who's the Labor candidate this year then?' 'I dunno mate. Politics doesn't interest me. But a Labor man has to be better than those poncy-ass rich bastards that run the Liberals.' And on the other side of the class-line... 'So who are you voting for Tarquin?' 'Oh, Liberal, of course Nigel. Labor supports the workers, which means that I'll have to take more out of my pocket and I'll get less productive hours out of my employeess. The Conservatives are a bunch of bleeding hearts who have no real idea that the country should be run like a business. And as for the Greens... well, they are just a bunch of hippy tree-huggers.' And the hippies... 'Greens man, they're all for looking after the environment and protesting. Yeah man, gotta be the Greens. Two, four, six, eight, who do we appreciate?' Sad, but too true in too many cases.
Now, if you take the political parties out of the picture, wouldn't more people be more inclined to actually look at the candidates themselves and the policies they support on a more personal level? Now, I'm not advocating taking the parties away completely... just make it a no-no to use their party as their personal soap-box. Make it illegal for the parties themselves to fund the election campaigns and supply each candidate with a campaign fund that will provide them with a more equal footing. Wouldn't a cap on spending make it necessary to shift the focus to what that candidate can offer the country? Wouldn't it promote the use of those funds more effectively for their own benefits? No bullshit in using a large party's considerably larger arsenal of funds to discredit the smaller party's candidate because they have nothing good to say about their own. For that matter... make it illegal to even mention the party that they themselves support during election time. The party supporters would still know who their preferred candidate is, but the general public (the every day bloke that has no interest in the day to day running of the political scene) would have to do a bit of research themselves. They would be forced to think about their own values... 'I want a leader who focuses more on families'... 'I want a leader who will look after the environment'... 'I want a leader who isn't afraid to stand up for the worker'... 'I want a leader who will put more into my own pocket'... etc. And in the process of doing that research, they may even find out that some of the policies of a candidate are not what they want after all... might in fact be something that would deter them from voting for someone they previously thought was acceptable.
Thus the priority of the general public would be more likely to focus on the benefits of each candidate on their own merits, and the winning candidate would be there because of public opinion... then and only then would the true majority rule. Do you imagine that little Johnny would have been elected if he'd had to stand up and actually tell the public exactly what it is that he had done for the country? If he had been made to admit that he wasn't good at maths?... if he had admitted that he couldn't answer the most basic of questions on that quiz show that he'd failed miserably at?... if he hadn't been connected by his party's umbilical cord to the richest and most influential corporations in the country? By the same token, would Paul Keating have been elected if he hadn't had the 'support' of Bob Hawke, who was at the time arguably one of the best-loved politicial figures in Aus history?... would he have been elected if his vision for Australia had been made public sooner? I won't bother about the other parties, because in all honesty, these two are the only ones that really have any chance of getting a bum in that particular seat. So in essence, we are at the moment stuck with only two options... and which one is the lesser evil is the argumentative point, not the candidate's own individual merits.
Now, as for the candidates themselves. Why is it that we just accept that we have to vote for someone who has been weeded out of the sludge by some masked party figure? The process of choosing these particular candidates seems (at least to me) to be on whether or not they'll cause waves for the bosses behind the scenes. Each party has it's own priorities, and their preference seems to go to whoever is more likely to follow those priorities to the letter. Oh, public opinion gets a bit of a look-in, but only in the event that those bosses think the candidate might actually harm their party in some way. We don't have a positive influence on the selection process at all... after all, let's look at Bob Hawke again. He was revered by many of the voting public, but then I think that he started to get a little too big for his boots... started to want to run the country his way, rather than the party's way. Add to that the fact that he admitted to being human, admitted that his family life was less than perfect, and then (shock, horror) lost it and started bawling like a big baby in front of the whole of Australia. That endeared him even more to some members of the community, but pretty soon he was making Labor look like a bunch of big soppy sooky boys, rather than the staunch bulldogs that they wanted to be portrayed as. So send in someone like Paul Keating...
Another comment on Gryph's blog made by Aries67 reminds us that our Prime Minister should be one who works for us... that in essence the Australian public is the boss and the PM is the employee. Somewhere along the line we've forgotten that... or rather, we've allowed ourselves to be pushed into the ranks of shareholders with a board of committee members to represent us by making the hard decisions. Now generally speaking, shareholders don't really give a rat's ass about how the company is run as long as that little bit of change comes in from the profits made. Whereas, board members receive a huge salary, plus the ability to influence things in their own favour... things such as giving themselves pay rises amounting to the thousands while the shareholders get a cent or two extra a year. The thing is that when you put our government into that context, we the shareholders have given up the right to any input in the company, and we aren't even getting that small change any more. Why do we put up with that?
So comes the idea of the public putting forward candidates. Oh, I realise that we'll get some pretty stupid suggestions... but is that all we'll get? Isn't it possible that someone good will be offered the job rather than be overlooked because they might be seen as being a potential cause of waves. And if there are enough votes for someone who has no political connections, couldn't this force each party to really consider the things that the public thinks are important in the push to get this person on board? In the process of trying to win the candidate's loyalty, couldn't it be feasable to imagine that certain parties would be forced to rethink the stagnation that has been the cornerstone of said party? Couldn't it even be reasonable to suggest that the candidate would be able to take control of the reins back a little? And wouldn't it make more sense for that candidate, when elected, to keep the public's requirements in mind, lest they not be nominated at the next election? And wouldn't that mean that we end up with more say in the matter of running our country the way we think it should be run?
But we all know too well that changing things is not as easy as that. After all who, after realising that they have the power to make this sort of change, would actually advocate for it? Who in their right mind would take the chance that their power might be stripped away in preference of someone more popular if they support this kind of thing? Who would give up the financial security of a major party so that they can advocate a system of equality in campaigning which would take away the advantage they already have? Certainly not the Liberals... not Labor either. Both of these parties know that they are the only two that have any real swing, and both of these parties are too focused on their own goals. So I guess we'll just have to grin and bear it. Maybe fool ourselves into thinking that we have some input into our country. Unfortunately, the only people who will even be given a look-in are those who are in the seats that are governed by the more influential members of the oposition party (like you, Aries). The reigning government will try to convert you to keep you from voting for the opposition again, and the opposition will target you so that they don't lose the votes you've already gi
