© Nicola Dane

 

 

Magazine Idol  

 What is it like?

I find myself wondering.

What is it like to be you?

Do you ever get lonely?

How could you ever feel lonely

when you’re surrounded by people?

I know.

I have felt the same sense of being invisible in a room

crammed full of people.

People see your sad eyes, but no ones really notices.

---

 

Child’s Letter to God

 

Do you hear me?

Do you hear me whisper to you in the comfort of darkness?

I like to think you do.

Do you see me?

Do you see me when no one is looking?

I hope not, but something tells me you do.

Do you feel me?

Do you feel the pain I feel when I’ve stubbed my toe or do you just feel that sinking feeling that I do when I break dad’s favourite beer mug?

Do you smell me?

Do you smell my favourite perfume when I marinate myself in it to impress my new boyfriend.

I hope you can.

Do you taste the things I do?

Have you experienced true bliss after eating home made apple pie?

Are you allowed such things?

I have five senses.

Do you have more?

I wonder if you can read my mind. Everyone says you can. So how come you’ve never appeared when I’ve wished it?

Maybe you do have more than five.

Maybe you have eight or nine.

However many you have I only care about one.

Can you see what’s inside my heart?

 

---

Lullaby

 

Sleep now my baby,

Awake only in soft dreams.

Let the days discoveries

Bind themselves to your heart.

Allow your body tp nestle into

these soft blankets.

I’ll watch over you.

Shhh.. now my little explorer,

Let the tension lines disappear

With a yawn

Descend my sweetheart

Till a new sun awakens your curiosity.

---

 

Alchemist Boy

 

How ‘bout that?

I whittled you down

Till you where something a

Tourist might collect.

Hunting Property.

Cut. Dried. Lacquered.

You sit beside a collage of

Multicoloured trophies.

Seen by all,

Desired by none.

How ‘bout that….?

---

 

 Jealousy

 

I’m tired –

I am restless from your hurried promises.

Unchain my guilt from these walls and

Set me free!

I wont be a slave to your

Compromises or disgruntled dreams

I want to leave this place!

I will cast your burdens from my shoulders

And shatter you with my rebellion

This was never my war,

I was only the battlefield.

---

Leaving You

 

Why is it my fault you fell

Discarded,

From the sky like a

Disappointed rain-drop?

 

Take your destiny!

Fasten it beside your resentment

So that the world may see

All you stand for.

I may pick up your dirty laundry

But I wont wash the stain of

Envy from your dirty hands.

Funny, we started out as equals.

---

 Black and White

 

Hunch those shoulders

Just like Lurch did.

Does anybody remember the

Sad giant?

His legs where like telegraph poles

But his eyes where tinnier

Then a grain of salt.

He’d come at the beckon call,

Desperate to find acceptance –

But was only given obligation.

 

I press my fingers to your side,

Just like I used to caress

The black and white screen.

I tried to help him escape,

Tried to explain. (you can’t help TV)

 

Please Sir,

Don’t disappear below the tagline.

It’ll be okay,

Tomorrow you’ll escape the grey

And find rich colour.

 

---

Little Girl

 

You say I am ‘childish’,

As if I should be ashamed

That I am not constantly

Glancing over my shoulder.

While my world breeds on

Butterfly kisses and giggles,

Your world is mutilated

By multi-faced cocktails

And heavy fake lashes.

It is not me who should

Wear the pity.

My eyes will always shine bright

Against your cloudy sky,

Maybe I’ll make a wish for you

And light up your candles.